Why We Need to Let Go of ‘The Relatable Blogger’

Pink desk

I had a message the other day from someone telling me why they were no longer reading my blogs or watching my videos (thank you for that by the way). The reason? I’m no longer relatable.
They said they used to love my Primark hauls and beauty posts but they can’t afford to go away to nice hotels or on holiday therefore I’m being unfair. Because I share my weekends away, trips abroad and nice meals out I’m no longer ‘a relatable blogger’, and it got me thinking…
What actually is a relatable blogger? And what exactly makes a blogger ‘attainable’?
If I have a mortgage that renders me ‘unattainable’ to those who are renting and limited on what they can do with their place. My home style and renovation posts? Un-relatable.
I don’t have children – so that renders me ‘unattainable’ to those who have kids and can’t drop everything and get away for the weekend or spontaneously do something in the city. My weekends away/anything spontaneous that requires little planning? Un-relatable.
I love food and happily spend my spare money on meals out – so that renders me ‘unattainable’ to those who don’t love food as much and would prefer to spend their spare money on something else. My fancy restaurant reviews? Un-relatable.
I love to travel and I save and save to enjoy my luxury holidays – so that renders me ‘unattainable’ to those who would prefer to spend their savings on something else or can’t afford to go abroad every year. My travel posts? Un-relatable.
Everyone earns different salaries. Everyone prefers to spend their money on different things. Should we be censoring ourselves and our own lives just because someone else may not be able to do the same thing right now?
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I’m not rich. Everything I do I save for – cut back on some things to afford others, it’s how I’ve always been brought up and how I’ve always been. I can’t afford to eat at Michelin star restaurants every weekend but I like to have that meal out as my birthday present, my one birthday present, because that’s what I enjoy. I find deals for nice hotels away, book them when they’re on offer for a little getaway and some ‘me time’. I shop at Primark for most of my clothes but I have a Michael Kors handbag on my arm that I worked my little bottom off so I could save up and buy and treasure. I wait for holiday prices to drop and shop around to get the best options that fit with my budget.
We work DAMN hard for our money so we can spend it how WE want to.
This job sometimes enables me to visit amazing hotels and beautiful parts of the world so I can inspire others through my writing, filming and photography and you know what? I LOVE IT. Getting to test out top quality hotels and trips without spending money? It’s one of the best parts of my job and you can’t tell me you wouldn’t jump at the chance if you were me. But this doesn’t mean you should be going away EVERY weekend or jetting off on hundreds of holidays a year. Hell, non of the stuff I write or talk about means you SHOULD do anything.
But what it does do is enable me to show you more choice, more options and to widen my views so when I give an opinion about a place I can talk from a lot more experience about what else is out there and if it really is good value for money. And if you are planning weekend away or a holiday there’s even more inspiration for you to read through and watch.
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As bloggers we’re in a catch 22 – we have to be relatable and inspirational all at the same time and sometimes those two don’t go hand in hand. But at the same time, press trips aside, it’s my life so why should I censor it or the things I choose to do with my money? This blog moves with me and flows with my life, my lifestyle right now and that’s how I like it. Sometimes in life we have more freedom, more spare change, other times things happen and we may have to cut back – but it’s not fair to judge others because of where they’re at in life right now.
I’ve always enjoyed and always have spent my savings and my hard earned money after the bills on the finer things in life like good food, spa days and holidays in the sun, that’s just me and that hasn’t changed. Some people spend thousands a year on nice cars, designer shoes every month, cigarettes, golf memberships – it’s all relative. I hope to one day have children which means that my spare money will mostly be reserved for the tiny humans and family days out so I’m enjoying all the spa treatments, boutique hotels and adults only holidays while I can. If you have the opportunity to do it all whilst still paying your bills and saving for the bigger things then you go glen coco.
I’m just a young woman living out her dreams one day at a time. Sometimes my weeks are filled with glorious adventure, sometimes they’re spent sat at home, no makeup, just doing my thing. It’s of course your choice who you decide to read or watch and your tastes will naturally change over time, but before you blame the blogger or vlogger for ‘no longer being attainable’ have a think about what that actually means, and if in reality it’s just that your lifestyle no longer fits in with theirs.
We’re all different and that’s what’s makes the blogosphere and the world a great place to be but at the same time that’s exactly why as a reader you shouldn’t expect every blogger to fit in line with your expectations of ‘attainable’
Remember, no two lives are the same and you can’t please everyone.
xax

17 Comments

  • The word ‘relatable’ is to subjective. As you say in the opening paragraph, it is impossible to be ‘relatable’ to everyone. As a married woman in her thirties, my experiences may not be relatable to you and vice versa but I still enjoy reading your blog because I like your personality and I’m interested in the fun things that you do and buy whether they are things I’d do or not. That’s what blogging is to me, it’s about the person, their experiences and how they ‘relate’ those to their readers.

    Actually some bloggers interest be because I have nothing in common with them, but it allows me an insight into the life of someone who lives in another country, is much older / younger than me or is living with a disability for example. Once again the thing that makes these blogs interesting is the person whether they shop in Chanel or Primark.

    IF you want a designer handbag, buy it and don’t worry what other people think, you don’t need to justify yourself. If you want a nice holiday you deserve it and if you head off on a cool press trip, you’ve worked hard to be offered that! Plus you’ll come back with loads of interesting stories and useful information.

    Just keep being you and ignore those who judge!

  • Amelia, although I’ve not followed your blog for a long time, I love what I have read & watched. I’ve laughed & cried (He was such a character), I can’t wait to hear about your recent trip.
    I’m a disabled 53 year old Mum to 5 with 6 young grand children – apart from being female and having the love of blogging I really don’t think we have anything in common, but your blog is up there as one of my favourites, when a notification drops in my inbox I rush over to read the latest segment.
    I think the person who said you are un-relatable maybe going though a difficult part of their life or very jealous! You have worked hard to get where you are & if I was you I’d jump at every press opportunity, that was suitable to me , enjoy every second,
    Go on keep enjoying your blogging journey & we will keep following you.
    You share life good & bad, without the bad the good wouldn’t be good, remember that.
    Right rambled enough. When is the Indonesia post coming can’t wait! xx

  • Interesting. I don’t think people have to be relateable but I do find myself largely reading blogs written by people who live similar lives to myself – I have no interest in children so I don’t read blogs about parenting. If a blogger I like has a baby and suddenly starts blogging about their kid then I don’t begrudge them their happiness but I do drift away from their blog because it’s just not interesting to me. I can see how the same can be said for fashion bloggers that start out in Primark and move away from their original readers (especially when many of the items they eulogise about are freebies – can you really judge the worth of a free designer bag?).

    It’s a hard one, I like to be inspired but the bloggers I love the most are those who work full-time jobs, blog as a hobby and do interesting stuff. Luckily the blogging world is big enough that everyone has their own niche and audience.

    Lisa | Not Quite Enough

  • I adore this post but it makes me sad that you’ve had to write it really, I don’t quite understand ‘relatability’. I have friends in the real world who are at different life stages and those who are at the same one as me and we hang out and have things to talk about and stories to share, why is that different in blogland? Different strokes for different folks I guess but if something is well written and entertaining (like this!) then actually, I’m not too fussed about the content. Like when I see friends, if we’re having fun and the time’s whizzing by who cares where we’re at in life? I’d never dream of texting a friend to say ‘by the way, you know that baby you just pushed out? Yeah, I’m not going to hang out with you because I don’t have one’. I don’t know why people think it’s OK to go out of there way to spread negativity from behind a computer screen. It’s ridiculous and it says more about their life than it does about anything else that they felt the need to reach out and try to make you feel bad about the life you’re leading.
    WELL didn’t that turn into the mother of all rants?
    Basically, you do you dude, don’t explain yourself to anyone. Ever.
    M x Life Outside London

  • Very great post. I love non relatable blogger because me as a blogger and reader we need to expand our post, not just in one niche or topic. Eventhough SEO sometimes doesn’t really ranked this blog niche. Keep making blogpost Amelia, I love your blogs and vlogs xx

    http://www.extraodiary.com

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